Midnight Musings
by Lady Laurelin
Summary: Drabble. Gen. Sam remembers dying and what he has to live for.


AN: I do not own these characters.

Night caressed the small town of Sweetwater, Tennessee. In a small motel room on the outskirts of town, golden light spilled into the otherwise dark interior of the motel room through the partially open curtains. Sam Winchester lay staring at the ceiling. The meager glow from the lone parking lot light slashed across his face and upper chest like the sliver of light that betrays someone hiding in a closet.

Occasionally a sound would cause him to glance toward the window but all he ever saw was the yellow of the street light and the intermittent flash of the red vacancy sign. This motel, just like thousands of others he'd been in, was nothing remarkable. In the dark he couldn't even remember what color the room was painted in. Probably beige. With Green carpet. That seemed to be the norm. Still, the beds were fairly comfortable, and Dean hadn't been able to run out all the hot water, even with his half hour, marathon shower.

Staring at the ceiling, he thought about Jess and all the nights they'd fallen asleep in each others' arms. That had been his dream, his saving grace. And now it was gone. This…life…he led, it wasn't the one he had wanted. It wasn't what he'd dreamed about all those years ago in all those thousand other motels.

But it _was_ his. One demon had taken his mother and, later, his father from him. Another laid claim to his brother's soul, but none of them…_none_ of them knew what he was capable of. Not a single one of them knew the power he held.

He'd heard what the yellow-eyed demon said to Dean in the cemetery. He knew the fear lurking in the back of his brother's eyes. What he hadn't admitted he knew until this moment was what happened during the time his heart stopped beating and started again after Dean's deal with crossroads demon.

It hadn't been long. No more than a few hours could have passed yet, according to Dean, a lifetime had gone by. He'd seen his mother again. She had held him and called him her baby. She'd dried the tears on his face and told him she was proud of the man he had become. She'd hugged him again and told him there was another who wanted to see him.

He'd fallen to his knees when Jessica appeared before him. Tenderly she'd brushed the hair off his forehead and kissed his brow. She didn't blame him. She was happy. She wanted him to move on.

But how could he move on? He was dead. That fact had not escaped his notice.

_Death, Sam Winchester, is only the beginning of your fight._

He'd turned at the voice. Turned away from Jessica. Turned away from his mother. He had to protect those he loved.

_You have been marked by great evil yet touched by the greatest love._

A man had appeared before him. The armor had been bloodstained and the warrior weary, but Sam could feel the strength, the righteousness flowing from him. No spawn of Hell could project the inner peace and _rightness_ he felt.

_Not all of God's creatures can be saved .Not all are meant to be saved. Some, though, have been sent by God himself to guide you along your path. Know He will not abandon you. Trust He will guide you in the fight to come. Remember, man was not meant to walk alone._

Too many nights he'd thought about those words. Too many nights he'd lain awake wondering exactly what they meant. Tonight he thought he knew.

Once upon a time he'd had a mother…a girlfriend…a father. Now all he had was a brother. A brother who would face the fires of hell for him. _Oh, yes_. Death had only been beginning. _If the underworld thought he would give up his mentor, protector, savior…_so many words flitted across him mind but only one truly encompassed all he felt…_his Dean, then they had never really seen a man possessed._

Come Hell or…anything else they wanted to throw at him….he would do what was necessary to save his brother. He would not walk this path alone. His power, his power he was sure now came from Heaven, would be used against those who threatened the good in this world, those who threatened his one true saving grace.

"Sam?" the voice asked sleepily from the bed next to his.

"Go back to sleep, Dean. Everything's going to be all right." And, somehow, he knew it would be, come Hell or…whatever they faced next.


End file.
